Day 2

Seems to her that her life is full of waiting hopelessly. Her new path just has an enormous obstacle to her fulfill happiness. She started to wonder why should she waits and keep waiting and waiting, but although he doesn’t want to. But why it bothers her, cause she cares, she truly does, she cares. He might not have that big of a place in her heart right now, but she cares. Hurts and pain and many disastrous incidents occurred in her past, she froze her heart, numb her mind, just to get away of all the bullshit in this life. She thought she found he who cares for her actually, but he, whom does not. Again she was mistaken. She was so stupid to think she could pour her heart out this time.  It got crushed before it actually appears Tears ran down her face even when she’s not intended to.  She cares, she did, she does, she will as long as he still hers He cares, he did. He stopped by stepping away from her She left alone again, for one more time, her soul broke apart by his words “Why am I always have to wait?! Why am I the one that waits for so many times?!”  There’s a question that has no answer in her head right now She came out bluntly, she stopped speaking truthfully.  She punks with people’s feelings, she thought she could be so tough that she is strong right now but she got even weaker She might does not need to pure her heart out, she does not need to get to her knees for him She should seek for the signs, those signs that he does not have any feeling for her.  After all, right now they are together, a little sympathy might be just fine. But oh c’mon, from the beginning it was a game to both himself and her Is he truly care ? He said he did, but again, she heard words She trusted it, she believed in it, she thought she could do it one more time. To actually believe in empty words But no, it’s useless shoving those thoughts into her head. Blunt !  Bullshits !!! What could have she done wrong ? What did she do to make him saying things like that into her ears? She does not deserve this But that’s might be true, she’s not that important compared what he’s having right now in his life. Yeh true she isn’t. She’s just an ordinary little chick like others that came in and out of his life. She understands that she is either let this go, move on as normally as she can the next day. Or finish it right here, because it’s so easy for people to say goodbye.  They say goodbye when they ready too, they give no shit thought about the person they’re saying it with. It is just so damn easy telling this is over. They won’t hurt as much if they start, if they begin and finish it. She could be this person if she wants. All she needs is a phone call, a little “Hey, where are you?!” and the rest goes on as normal. “I don’t think we should be together and I don’t think you’re being true with me. You seem to have other priorities in your life, and in my way I can’t see where I’m fit in. So it’s better if we go on our own way.” a little white lies, a little humor and mocking, it’s all she needs to get this over with.